Interracial Relationship – The Challenges and Opportunities of an Interracial Relationship
Interracial relationships are much more common than they used to be. But an interracial relationship can still bring with it an array of challenges. Yet it also offers plenty of opportunities for you to learn from each other and to gain new perspectives on your lives and marriage. Here are a few suggestions to keep in mind as you encounter the challenges and opportunities of an interracial relationship.
Interracial relationship suggestion #1: Don’t underestimate the challenges
An interracial relationship will most likely face at least some external pressure. Perhaps older family members will be less than comfortable when they see who’s coming to dinner. And parts of the larger society itself may show a certain amount of intolerance regarding interracial relationships.
Challenges will also appear, though, from within your own interracial relationship. The fact that you come from different families of origin will likely mean that you’ll each make different assumptions about how a family works. And those assumptions won’t always be compatible. This, by the way, is the case in any marriage, not only in an interracial relationship. But in an interracial relationship, there’s a good chance that at least some of these challenges will be accented, especially if you choose to have children.
Interracial relationship suggestion #2: Don’t overlook the opportunities
Despite the added pressures and challenges inherent in an interracial relationship, the good news is that more than most married couples, you two have the opportunity to expose each other to whole new ways of looking at the world and living your lives. Think about it: Your food, your holidays, your family traditions, your approach to work and finances, your language, your religion, your sex life—virtually every part of your interactions will give you the chance to learn from each other and appreciate each other in new ways.
Interracial relationship suggestion #3: Discuss your differences
Open communication is important in any marriage, and in an interracial relationship, it’s absolutely crucial. It’s important that you two discuss your differing ideas and feelings about who you are. Authentic, respectful conversations will deepen your mutual understanding and strengthen the bond between you.
Interracial relationship suggestion #4: Show respect
You two may already know that an interracial relationship can come with some conflict. That’s not at all bad, but that conflict can be emotionally laden because it’s tied to traditions and assumptions about how families interact. So by remaining respectful, you two can view your differences as an opportunity to better understand each other, and thus to grow even closer.
Interracial relationship suggestion #5: Consider each other’s perspective
As a guiding rule of thumb, try to see difficult situations through the eyes of your spouse. And be careful to avoid being too rigid or showing any disrespect regarding what matters most to your partner. If you two can put yourselves in each other’s shoes, you’ll have a better chance of finding a mutually agreeable compromise in which you agree on what you can both embrace.
Interracial relationship suggestion #6: Trust your children
If you have children, and depending on their ages, view your negotiations as a teaching time. Consider letting your kids observe as you two grapple with some of the issues that arise from your interracial relationship. This will help make your home an open, nurturing environment where all questions and feelings are permissible.
Interracial relationship suggestion #7: Maintain your compassion
Finally, remember that love is about compassion and gentleness. Remain true to your wedding vows even when you disagree about an emotionally contentious issue, and honor each other with love, kindness, and respect.
Additional Resource: http://www.healthfinder.gov/orgs/HR2417.htm
